Hi! I’m Kelsey, I identify with she/her pronouns. I am a worldwide elopement photographer who runs a multiple six figure business with my husband as a hub and wifey photo and video team! I am a believer that all love, bodies, abilities, races, genders and sexualities are to be celebrated and seen. We are on the front lines to make sure love stories of all kinds are seen! Which is why we take great pride in being an inclusive wedding photographer.
Being an Inclusive Wedding Photographer for Elopements
Not all weddings look the same. As elopement photographers, we know that better than anyone! We love allll the different weddings- beach, mountains, countries across the fricken globe!! But it’s more than a wedding just looking different because of the place. What makes a wedding special is the PEOPLE! The beautiful, magical, sweet human connection that makes love go round. When you begin to learn how to be an inclusive wedding photographer, the focus is on the inclusion of the people!
I wrote how to Be an Inclusive Photographer for LGBTQ+ Couples and introduced what it means to be inclusive for all. Now, I am diving into other allyships that photographers should be cultivating. I believe deep down in my core that everyone should have the right to marry the person they love. The biggest problem I see with the wedding industry is a white heteronormative skew without the beautiful diversity of people of color, body types, and the queer and trans communities.
How to work with couples to capture their true selves
I think it’s soooo important to get to know the couple and their relationship. As part of every consultation call, I ask them questions about their relationship, which shows I care and allows me to truly connect more deeply with them on their love story.
Inclusive Wedding Photographer Poses
When I am photographing couples, I use a series of prompts to capture the true emotion and the cute little weirdness of our couples. Instead of focusing on rigid “posing” I chose to let the couple interact instead. So something like, “walk hand in hand, bumping hips like you’re just a little tipsy coming out of the bar.” Or hold each other close and whisper in each other’s ear your favorite breakfast food… as sexy as possible. The great thing is that these prompts are everyday situations; it helps them to feel more connected and natural!
I’m always on the lookout for how my couples are interacting because we shouldn’t assume the roles in their relationship. I want them to have an equal share with equal holdings, equal cuddles, and equal time being held. Don’t fit your couples into that box of one holding more than the other. You can use prompts that are equal in terms of the “support and cuddle” roles.
Help Couples Feel Confident!
I find that larger clients can have trouble opening up in front of the camera, that there has been this stigma around them that they can’t have the poses that other couples have. Bullshit!! Encourage them to be themselves and don’t assume their limitations. If they want to pick up their partner they should do it! If they like the sexy photos, make them feel comfortable enough to be that way with each other!! What really makes the difference in photos is not size, race, age, whatever the fuck. It is HAVING FUN!! When the personality SHINES through!! That’s why I love my job. When you look at a photo and it tells a story, it invites you into someone’s heart!
As inclusive wedding photographers, we work on posing with EVERYONE! Because each couple has different parts about them they want to highlight. I think everyone inherently has a little part of “if I looked like this, then I could do that.” Read that again. E-V-ER-Y-B-O-D-Y. It can be AWKWARD being in front of a camera, but that’s literally the only thing holding couples back. It’s not the size, gender, race, etc. It’s in their own head and our job is to get them out of their head so they can see what we see – a love story.
When You are an Inclusive Wedding Photographer, You’ll Learn About Skin Tones and Promote Representation
First, I want to start with a visual: We’ve all been to the makeup counter and seen a million shades of coverup makeup. Now just for a second, think about all the color tones that correspond with those makeups. That’s a LOT! And it’s not even accounting for all of them because… how could you even?!
I believe that exposure is key. Exposure for all skin tones! Also check your white balance. It’s a thing and I always want to get as accurate as I can in camera. This could mean shooting in Kelvin, using a gray card, or a white piece of paper to set your white balance.
You also need to practice on all forms of skin, indoors, outdoors, etc. Look at their heritage, what is their undertone, varying skin tones. Magenta vs. Green undertones. Go practice!
The undertone of someone’s skin is super important. Asian skins have green/olive undertone, vs. German. Get out and photograph all types of Asian heritage, vs. mediterranean. There’s no boxes. If there are green undertones and you are shooting under trees, stand at the outer edges where it’s lighter, and look for nearby natural reflectors like gravel, brick, or sidewalks to bounce light onto your couples.
After your gorgeous photos have been captured, you need to pay attention to the editing. Be cognizant of your preset and how to adjust that accordingly. You should be using the luminance factor more than color. I also recommend going to a workshop that you know it’ll have diversity in the portfolio.
The Numbers and Opportunity for an Inclusive Wedding Photographer
Let me throw some hard numbers at you here. I’m located in the US, but I think the entire world can take pieces of this lesson. In the 2022 US census reported that a total of 43.6% of the population were listed as one of these categories:
- Black or African American
- American Indian and Alaskan Native
- Asian
- Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific Islander
- Two or more races
- Hispanic or Latino
That’s 144,752,000 people, 72,376,000 couples! I mean, the numbers speak for themselves! If you’re a business looking to expand into another market, this is it! The benefit of being an inclusive wedding photographer is that WE can foster a culture of diversity and inclusion of people from different backgrounds, lifestyles, and perspectives. Doing something so much bigger than ourselves!!
Social Media and Webpage
Two easy ways to make sure your website and social media presence are inclusive is to have big AF disclaimers! On the homepage of my website, I have a banner that states: “just to be abundantly clear, Honeybee is an all inclusive business. That means ALL love, bodies, abilities, races, genders, and sexualities are celebrated and welcomed here. It’s not a trend, it’s just how we do things.” If you care about inclusivity, show it! I also actively offer shoots to BIPOC and LGBTQ+ couples and follow diverse instagram accounts on instagram.
Photobug Community encourages, “Don’t just say you’re inclusive. Show it! We’re a visual industry! Make sure your homepage features people who all look and love differently. Showcase different skin tones, love stories, ages, sizes, and styles. So many times we use hashtags or share memes promoting diversity, but fail to actually highlight it on our pages. If you don’t currently have these representations of love in your portfolio, plan and participate in styled shoots.”
While we totally agree to show it, at Honeybee Weddings we also believe in telling the stories. We write captions on Instagram about who are couples are, we write blogs on all of our couples. We tell their stories. After all, we aren’t so different in this world.
Inclusivity Education
Please for the love of Hermoine, don’t put it on other people to have to educate you. Go look at BlairImani, Black Lives Matter, Pink Mantaray (Schuyler Bailar), ckyourprivilege, Ebony Janice on instagram. There are so many resources YOU can start with. Asking questions is always great, but come to the table with something to offer without making it their responsibility to give you the foundation.
If you have a photography team you need to make sure they are inclusive wedding photographers as well. In my Photographer Brand Onboarding Guide (currently discounted for our blog readers!) we do a deep dive on how to train your new inclusive wedding photographer. This covers their responsibilities, how to photograph as your brand, how to interact with your couples, how to be inclusive AND MORE. Your brand is your core foundation. It will be the northern light to direct your training. Your team is representing YOU and your core values.
But, what if I’m not doing it right?
I mean, let’s be honest. We photographers don’t know it all and it’s important to be honest about our blind spots. If you’re feeling stuck, you could run a little focus group of your diverse friends and ask them some questions about your biz. Ask if they would feel welcome in your brand? Would they question your stance on creativity?
I take my allyship pretty seriously. It’s not just about having a few couples posted on social media, it’s about using my platform to raise awareness of minority causes. I’m pretty loud and proud about my advocacy and that means more to me than anything else.
What YOU can do
First, I think we can all be learning more, attending workshops, photographing more diverse couples! You can also offer mini sessions for BIPOC and donate all of the money earned to a non-profit focused on the cause. This is two-fold as you are financially supporting the goals while also building your portfolio to attract more couples.
You should put a note about inclusivity on your social media pages and post all the different couples you have. Most importantly, build relationships! With ALL humans! The better you can serve your clients and get to know them, the better their story will translate in your art.
Our friends at Dirty Boots and Messy Hair make this real easy:
- Actively offer shoots to BIPOC and LGBTQ+ couples 🏳️🌈
- Follow diverse Instagram accounts for inspiration 💡
- Create Pinterest boards that reflect inclusive love 👨❤️👨
- Ask your diverse peers for advice on inclusivity 🤝
- Actively engage with the BIPOC and LGBTQ+ communities 📣
Whatever action you take, try to represent diverse couples the best you can.
To hear more, check out the podcast I did with the amazing Ingvlid Kolnes!
126. Embracing Inclusion in Photography: Lessons from Kelsey of Honey Bee Weddings
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